Clean as a Whistle!

One of the things I think sets 'old' people apart is when you hear all about their medical treatments and doctor visits. I plan to write about a medical treatment but just this once and I promise not to put this in my Christmas letter.

Last year when I turned 50, my cousin, Gary, sent me an article about having a colonoscopy and benefits and peace of mind it provides.

I was going to get to it one day.

When I went to the doctor this year for my check up, it was highly recommended that I do it now.

It was all set up for Monday at 6:30am. I was mentally ready. They called a few days before and asked could it be moved to Tuesday at 6:30 am. I had to check to see if someone could take me then and when Carl and KimT said that they could, I called back and said "Tuesday at 6:30 is fine."

I have heard that the prep is the worst part. I agree. Clear liquids on Monday. I had banana popsicles for breakfast with jello for dessert. I drank apple juice and sprite. Not too bad. For lunch I had chicken bouillon with more jello and now I moved on to white grape juice. Then the fun started... 4 pills to begin the cleaning out process. Not too bad, I could still function.

I need to say here that my family is amazing. They didn't eat any food at home on Monday. The girls took food as they left and ate their lunch before they got home. Thank you.

AT 1:30 I began drinking Miralax. I had to drink 8- 8 ounce glasses. The wonderful nurse the day before told me to mix it with different stuff to make it go down easier. I had it mixed with white grape juice, tea, and apple juice. I had to drink a glass every 20-30 minutes. The first three glasses went down great! and then.... The girls thought it would be good to watch The Gilmore Girls to distract me. It worked for awhile. 5 more glasses to go and I felt like Dumbledore in 'Half-Blood Prince' "Please don't make me drink anymore!" I got the rest down with the aid of chilled white grape juice. By now, I am a dishrag, on the sofa with Carl holding my hand.

I drank sprite and water til about 11:00pm. I could have nothing by mouth after midnight. The alarm went off at 5:40am. I kissed the girls goodby at 6 and we drove to the clinic. I checked in and sat back to people watch. Carl and I were sitting in a room with two other couples. We joked about all going out to eat together afterward! I was called back at 6:50. I had the nicest nurse. She was so gentle and the IV didn't even leave a bruise. She got me all comfy and even told me how beautiful my toenails were. At 7:25, I was wheeled into the procedure room. It was chilly- the nurse told me that the day before the air wasn't working and it was hot back there. I don't do 'hot' well so I was thankful that I had been postponed for a day. At 7:50 the doctor was telling Carl and me- I was still in laa laa land so I have no memory- that all was fine. At 9am I was tucked back into my bed at home and sleeping well.

I talked to a few folks on Tuesday. As soon as I answered the phone they all said " Ellen, are you okay?" My answer was " Yeeeesssss, (hear that in a very floaty sounding voice) I feel great!" I realize now that my family was home soon after that and I gladly handed off my cel and the land line.

One of my friends, who shall be nameless, got ahold of her cel phone on her way home from her procedure and she called people. Her message was the same from the office of her sister in a hospital to the place where she volunteers - She was Clean as a Whistle! She didn't just call them once but several times always with the same message.

Another friend thought it would be good to have it done during the Olympics so he could be distracted. He missed more of the games for those two days than he saw!

I was talking to Andrew before my procedure and complaining. He gently let me know that before he had his last x-ray he went through what I was going to have to go through plus even more. Oh, my.

My friend, Zach, who I have asked you to pray for, because his cancer is in his abdomen, has had to have several colonoscopies and he is 25.

If you are 50, get it done. Call me and I'll bring you some white grape juice and watch tv with you and give you lots of sympathy. I can highly recommend the clinic that did mine, call me and I'll tell you the name and my doctor.

Thanks Gary, send me the email again in 10 years!